17: Mean Girls, Hurt Girls, and the Path to Real Confidence
In this episode of the Growing Athletes Podcast, Amy Suiter tackles one of the most common and painful dynamics in youth sports, schools, and friendships: mean girl behavior, comparison, and insecurity.
Instead of labeling or shaming, Amy offers a powerful reframe that helps athletes, parents, and coaches understand what’s really happening beneath the surface.
What if “mean girls” aren’t mean at all, but hurt girls responding to insecurity in different ways?
Some act out.
Some pull away.
Both are searching for safety, belonging, and confidence.
This episode blends real-life stories, mindset coaching, and practical guidance to help listeners build true self-confidence, improve team chemistry, and create healthier relationships, on and off the field.
Key Takeaways for Athletes, Parents, and Coaches
- Insecurity is normal and human, especially in adolescence and competitive environments.
- Mean girl behavior and social withdrawal often come from the same root: lack of internal security.
- Comparison damages confidence and connection, whether it shows up loudly or quietly.
- True confidence is built from the inside out, not through approval, popularity, or performance.
- Athletes grow when they learn how to respond to insecurity with awareness instead of reaction.
- Coaches and parents play a critical role in creating cultures of belonging and emotional safety.
Episode Flow
Opening: Mean Girls and Hurt Girls
Amy reframes the “mean girl” label and invites listeners to see insecurity with compassion, understanding, and honesty. This opening sets the tone for growth without judgment.
Why Insecurity Shows Up in Teams and Friendships
A relatable exploration of how insecurity fuels comparison, gossip, exclusion, anxiety, and disconnection—especially in sports and school environments.
Two Common Responses to Insecurity
- The athlete who acts out, compares, or seeks control
- The athlete who withdraws, stays quiet, or disappears
Amy explains how both responses are protective strategies, not personality flaws.
How to Build Real Confidence and Security
Practical mindset coaching for:
- Athletes who struggle with comparison or social pressure
- Parents supporting kids through friendship challenges
- Coaches building strong team culture and emotional resilience
This section focuses on awareness, values, and choosing who you want to become under pressure.
Creating Healthy Team Culture
How adults can model confidence, accountability, and belonging without labels, favoritism, or fear-based leadership.
Closing: Remembering Who You Already Are
Amy closes with a reminder that true confidence isn’t earned through popularity or performance…it’s remembered. A call to live and lead from identity, values, and inner security.
Connect with Amy Suiter
Website: www.amysuiter.com
Instagram: @asuiter25
Facebook: Amy Suiter
YouTube: @amysuitercoaching
Don’t Forget
If this episode helped you better understand mean girl behavior, comparison, insecurity, or confidence in athletes, please share it with a parent, coach, or athlete who needs it.
These conversations change cultures.
